Do nothing

There are few people that come into your life that exude wisdom. I have been fortunate to have several cross my path. They are the people you learn from by thought, action and word. They are certainly not perfect, generally humble and often seek knowledge and improvement on a daily basis in their own lives. One of the wisest women I know suggested a very simple, powerful item for my list; do nothing. Today I did nothing.

Doing nothing is not an easy task for me. Often as I attempt to be still and meditate, my to do lists run rampant in my head. As I sit to relax, I am quickly distracted and bounce up to wipe a counter or switch a load of laundry. I have used various tools such as coloring a mandala or listening to music to focus my intentions, but it takes great discipline for me to even begin the formality of such.

This morning met me with ups and downs, happiness and sadness, glee and anger; all before 11:00am and the roller coaster continued into the afternoon. Instead of eating the pizza and mozzarella sticks I cooked to cope with it all, I fed them to the dogs and decided to do nothing. I sat comfortably in the sun in our backyard, our blessing of a back yard. The sun warmed me and the cool breeze was just enough to keep me comfortable. I concentrated on the panting of my senior dog Dutch, stroking his head as he rested on my lap. The sound of the train rocking in the distance, and the birds chirping began to soothe me. Joy surrounded me and I smiled from the jingling of the tags on my spry Zaida’s collar galloping across the yard, the splashing of the ducks in the pond and the buzzing of a fantastically large bumblebee obviously intrigued by my rest. I soaked up the sun and pondered the life I have shared with Dutch. Dutch and I have been together for 12 years. He’s seen me at my best, my worst and my wackiest and he loves me all the same. The harsh reality is that there may soon be a day when Dutch is no longer here, just like that of all others in our lives.

Today I did nothing. Today I enjoyed my moments. Today I am reminded to slow down, stop planning, and enjoy the things and people around me. Excuse me while I go hug my son, and maybe I’ll even greet my husband with a smile when he gets home. If not today, maybe one day soon you too can answer “what did you do today?” with a great big sincere smile and “nothing, simply nothing.”

Balance 2.0

I promised a few weight loss blogs and this morning, I am holding myself to it. This week was like most others, full of ups and downs. I failed to plan out the week, failed to pack my bag of snacks and meals, and found myself with too many trips to the cafeteria at work. They have a fantastic cafeteria where I work, full of healthy and not so healthy choices. A fresh pizza being taken out of the oven with a plethora of yummy toppings yielded my reach for the salad bar more than one time this week. An early day without pizza lead me to the country store for a slice of pizza on the way home. I love pizza. I could live on pizza and ice cream.

Having pizza for lunch pretty much zaps out my points and allows for fruits and veggies the remainder of the evening. I did acknowledge the points calculator and got a little creative with dinners this week. I balanced out my slices of pizza with roasted vegetables for dinner. I love broccoli, cauliflower, anything smothered in garlic and roasted in the oven until it begins to blacken. You can eat almost a whole bowl for virtually no points. I baked our chicken and other meats and actually weighed my portion. I filled my plate with about ¼ meat and the rest roasted veggies. Yum. Satisfying. Point friendly.

The key to weight loss is really about balance. Be aware. Admit and log what you really eat; bites, licks and tastes included. I believe the yard work and stacking wood helped; but I managed a 2.0 lb loss this week. Hooray! I’ve moved another twenty stones to the LOSS jar and the LOSE jar is actually showing some space in it. May the movement be with you this week too! J

A Blessing in the Closet

The List has become more than I had planned and I am only three months in to a year long journey. I have found amazing opportunities and seized them. I have had fantastic ideas suggested and planned them. I have opened myself up to you and the others in my life and have been blessed in return. Things I only dreamed of are becoming reality or have become a casual norm. This week has brought me a lifelong dream, one I never thought could play out into the reality it has become.

I grew up not knowing my biological father or his family. I was blessed with an amazing grandfather who filled that paternal role. I was further blessed with a man who came into my life as a young child, married my mother, adopted me and raised me as his own. I always wondered what was on the other side, but being the feeling child, I never wanted to interrupt the normal routine of my paternal family. As I matured, I realized there was much more to my thoughts and feelings and I had become comfortable with what I didn’t know. Every family has its ups and downs, and its closets. When those closet doors open, you cannot forget what you saw inside. This week, one of my closet doors flew wide open, and I am in love with what has bounced out in front of me.

His name is Roger. He is my brother. His smile is contagious, even in photos. His eyes seem to be a reflection of my soul. His voice is fun and calming all in one. His stories seem so sincere and from a perspective I truly applaud. It has been only a few short days since we spoke the first time, but after one conversation I can pick up the phone and call him as if we knew each other all of our lives.

I have planned a visit with him and his family on the way to our spring break excursion in just a few short weeks. I am not afraid, I am excited. I know there are leaps and bounds, bridges and barriers, and laughter and tears to come. With blessings, someday soon I will mock him as I do my baby brother Fred, or perhaps I will experience a new perspective as Roger razzes his little sister.

Roger, thanks for typing that email.

Portion Distortion?

Weight watching is not for wimps. I have said it before and I’ll say it again. I have learned a few good things along the way and I’ve struggled with a few I can not seem to get through. Here’s a post about a little bit of both.

Lesson 2: Portion Control. My husband and I have classic cars. Neither our 67 Chevelle nor our 65 Impala have a cup holder. No cup holder. We have an early ninety something Rodeo that he loves, and is great on gas. It has no cup holder, and it is not an automatic. Do you know how difficult it is to shift, steer, and hold a venti mocha? My thighs are too big and the drink is too hot to balance it gracefully between my legs they way my sweety does his Dr. Pepper. We adored our ninety something Jetta. It had a cup holder. A cup holder that only allowed a child sized fountain drink to fit below the rest of the console. No large, absolutely no supersized sweet tea could fit. Now, our 2000+ SUV and extended cab truck…. not one, not two but four cup holders in the truck and six in my SUV. These cup holders could fit a liter bottle of soda, a supersized drink or maybe even a quart of OJ. Just like the cup holder evolution, our liquid intake has at least quadrupled over my adult life. It is easy to drink more than a healthy intake of calories for an entire day in one super sized beverage from the drive thru. The rest of our portions have grown as well.

Normal portions seem to be some sort of cryptic secret in society. A healthy portion of meat is 3 ounces. Why do our burgers come in pounds?  1 pound is equivalent to 16 ounces, a ¼ pound burger is equivalent to 4 ounces… and let’s not forget the common “double quarter pounder.” Really? That is almost 3 servings of meat alone! A serving of meat is visually equivalent to the palm of your hand or a deck of cards. Really? When was the last time you got that on a plate??? When we compare nutritional values and portions to what we actually consume, it can be quite a difference.

This week, it is my challenge to capture my portions. I vow to drink an extremely limited number of calories. I am planning water, water, and more water. Somehow, I have trouble counting my mochas and lattes, so it’ll be just my old faithful black coffee this week. I vow to actually use my measuring cups. I have really cool ladelish ½ and 1 cup spoons… they make me feel like I am not actually measuring. ;) This makes me more likely to use them. I actually bought a food scale. I have never owned one of these. I plan to be shocked.

This is Week 3 of tracking (well, mostly) and weighing in. I lost a few pounds prior to the “official” weigh in, but the success has certainly shown on the scale. Week 1 I weighed on a Sat morning and was down 2.2 pounds. I smile with each stone as we transfered 22 stones from the LOSE to the LOSS jar. Basketball bumped the following weigh in, so I weighed Week 2 only 4 days later at 6pm and was up 0.8 pounds. That actually was a good feeling for me, because I expected a few pounds up due to the breakfast, lunch and snacks on board. I reluctantly removed 8 stones from my LOSS jar and placed it back in the LOSE jar. Week 3 I weighed again in the evening and was down 2.8 pounds; 0.8 pounds I had lost once already and 2 new pounds. Yippee! It was fantastic to transfer 28 stones from the LOSE to the LOSS jar. I am enjoying watching the stones, and chose to celebrate with a new digital, glass scale to help me keep in check between weigh ins.

If you are considering buying a food scale or a you scale, our CVS had sleek, glass scales that were only $9.99 each, regular price. A $20 bargain and hopefully shocks and smiles to come.

Turning a Failure into Success

Weight watching is not for wimps. It is a week by week, hour by hour, minute by minute struggle, at least for me and I bet for a few of you too. The reality is that there is no true, done, voila, check. It is a constant, never ending commitment- sort of like marriage. In my first marriage, I failed. We married young and lasted in blissful denial for nearly ten years before the edges unraveled and we fell apart. My first weight loss success failed. I lost, got new clothes, gave away the old, and somehow one morning nothing in my closet fit.

My core being does not really believe in failure. Every person, every thing, every issue has a lesson for you to learn, a step to help you get to your best. The trick, blog readers, is to endure the lesson, learn from it and improve from some perspective. I was given many gifts in my first marriage, learned many lessons, and hope it all sets my current marriage up for success. It was certainly not a failure. Today, I am trying to apply this theory to my weight loss journey, and help set it too up for success.

Lesson 1: Plan your intake. I cannot count how many times I scooted to the school, picked up an SUV full of boys, plowed through homework at McDonald’s and dashed off to football practice only to pile those same stinky, smelly kids in the SUV, dash through the drive thru for shakes and pies, and hurry them all home. My calorie consumption rose to nearly a week’s plan in just a few hours. Planning the night before, packing a sandwich and a few snacks (at least for me, if not for the kids too) would have saved me at least a pants size. I can not blame it all on the kids. I have happily stopped for a biscuit in the morning, grabbed a mocha instead of a skim latte, and bought a burger and fries alone. A few minutes of planning and a good selection of healthy grab and go choices make all the difference.

This week, I tried some very successful grab and go ideas. I stole a Pinterest idea and made several jars of salad. Here’s how I did it: Slice your favorite salad stuff, cucumbers, green peppers, and grape tomatoes were my pick. Tear up assorted lettuces and layer the ingredients in pint size mason jars. I added a teaspoon of feta crumbles and a tablespoon of balsamic vinaigrette dressing. There was an easy salad to grab and go each morning for a week! A tablespoon of dressing saturated the salad and I will certainly cut that in half next time. That was almost my only source of countable calories, so I splurged for the full labeled serving. Toward the end of the week the greens were still pretty crunchy, but may have endured a bit better without the dressing. I’ll try ½ with dressing and ½ without until midweek next time.

I stocked my cabinets, car, pocketbook and desk with plenty of fresh fruits, low calorie/high fiber bars, cheese sticks and froze sliced strawberries in containers for a sweet, thawed midday treat. Canned soup and salads were my staple for lunch, and the snacks carried me quite well. I found some fantastic 80 calorie mini ice cream sandwiches to help with my night time struggles and make me feel like I was not on a diet. Not to forget, was my ever full, always carried water bottle and a few no cal/low cal flavor packs. Learn from my lesson. This week, plan it, stock it, and don’t forget to take it… and save a whole bunch of calories… and maybe even a pants size. J